Police Blotter
I haven’t done a very good job lately of sharing Podunk’s weekly police reports. I deeply apologize for this omission.
Here’s something from the April 17 paper:
Woman reported she is a truck driver and is traveling on Highway 28. She said approximately five miles east of town she observed a horse lying on its side in a pasture. She was concerned because when horses lay on their sides they are dead or dying. Dispatch assured her that it is normal for horses to lay down on occasion.
Podunk Meets Paradise 
Since deciding that the local rag was not worthy of my hard-earned money, the only thing I’ve missed is the blotter. Thank you for your diligence in sharing the foibles of our community.
Any time, pal.