Oops, I Bought Urban Shoes
Speaking of sensible shoes, I treated myself to a new pair of sneaks on one of my traumatic Back to School shopping trips. Trust me, I deserved them. I strolled around in my new Reeboks before I bought them, just like you’re supposed to. There’s definitely nothing like a new pair of shoes to put an extra spring in the step.
How sad to find out that I — she who could not be more rural — had accidentally bought urban shoes.
What are you talking about? you are probably saying to yourself. They are tennis shoes, for Chrissakes! I suppose you can’t wear hot looking Reeboks in Podunk?
Well, my friends, the problem is three-quarter inch crushed gravel. See, my new shoes have this tricky sole with slots meant specifically to capture and keep 3/4-inch crush. So when I stroll around gravel roads and my gravel driveway, which happens on a pretty damned regular occasion, my shoes turn into something akin to rocky moon boots.
So, I hope you’ll join me in writing to Uli Becker, president of Reebok, at email@example.com and urge him to stop waging war on Rural Americans. And try not to make fun of me when you see me wobbling toward you.
4 thoughts on “Oops, I Bought Urban Shoes”
What I love is that when you call the store to complain they say, “Don’t worry, just bring them back” never mind the entire day round trip that entails!
you guys wear SHOES? in rural America??? What’s up with that?
Not all the time.
So very true!